Renewal Issue 12
Portage County Children Services Levy

When I was fifteen, I was placed into the custody of the Portage County Job and Family Services. I was placed in their custody because my mother was an abusive alcoholic and I was using drugs. I was moved to a foster home where I had other foster siblings and a foster mom who seemed to really care. For the first time, I was living with a family who wasn’t dysfunctional; in comparison to where I grew up. I saw things for what seemed like the first time and I saw the opportunities that were being offered to me. I saw that I could better myself, as well as my life and future.

I wanted to be happy, to be a normal kid, in a normal home. Unfortunately, this calm household I was in was something I just couldn’t handle; I expected things to go wrong and was anxiously awaiting the chaos. My own inability to accept the change in my life undermined the one normality in my life, at that time. I was removed from that foster home and placed in a tri-state behavioral center. I underwent therapeutic care and I relearned what to expect in life. I came to terms with myself, as well as what my mother had done to me. I faced my addiction to the chaos in my life and decided it was time to change my line of thinking.

Fortunately, I had an amazing case worker who recognized the changes I was making and decided to work with me; to give me the opportunity to live a normal life. She gave me the choice to stay where I was, until she found another foster home or I could go to a group home, which included independent living coaching. I decided to go to the group home because I knew it would provide more opportunities for me and would better suit my needs.

When I arrived at my new placement, I found myself in a more chaotic situation than the previous foster home. I decided I wouldn’t let it break me; rather, use it as my drive. For a little over two years, I participated in the group homes rules and earned what they call unsupervised time. Which meant that for a specific amount of time, deemed acceptable by my case worker, I was allowed to leave and hang out with my friends, go to the movies; basically be a normal teenager. It felt so good to have been doing well for so long, I finally had the freedom to leave by myself and just be me.

There was a slight problem in my equation; I wasn’t sure who "me" was. I had been changing my lifestyle, my choices, my morals and the way I thought. I was torn on what to do with my free time. I found myself wanting to do the right thing as well as wanting to return to old habits. I was fortunately able to pull through and do the right thing. The freedom I had, to leave and go for a walk if I wanted to, to be able to go on a date or go do something I enjoyed on my own time was the perfect reward for doing right. I was finally able to appreciate the serenity and peace of mind of living my life the right way.

By the time I was sixteen, my case worker and the group home wanted me to get a job, so that I could move on to the program offered by the group home called independent living. Unfortunately, it was very hard to find a job because so few were available and I did not get one until I was seventeen. I began working anywhere from twenty hours a week to thirty-seven. Every time I was paid I was required to hand over half my check so that it would be saved for when I turned 18 and it became my responsibility to come up with meals for myself. I was finally in the independent living program.

The main focus of this program was for me to be as prepared to move out on my own as I possibly could. Thankfully my case worker was able to go to bat for me and got many things approved that normally wouldn’t have been okay. She got it approved for me to spend a weekend with a relative who flew up here to see me graduate. She also allowed me to graduate from high school early. She stood by my side and offered the support I needed to get where I am today and the best part is, she let me learn on my own, but was there when I needed her. She was the light guiding my way.

There were many times that most people would have given up on helping me but thankfully she never did. I really needed someone like that in my life so that I didn’t lose faith in myself. She allowed me to get a car before I turned 18, as well as an apartment which I had worked and saved for. She went to bat again so that I could get a voucher for furniture, which would make life so much easier because I just didn’t have the money for anything better. It would have been months before I would have even been able to begin furnishing my house. I would have had to go to rent a center or yard sales to get my furniture.

A lot of the kids placed in the custody of Job and Family Services do not realize that the system is really here to help them make something of themselves. They see the system as unhelpful, as a form of keeping them down but in reality, it is amazingly helpful. The things that are now possible in my life, such as being able to go to college and having been able to get my feet on the ground before I turned 18 is something that very few people like myself have the opportunity to do. I feel very prepared for life on my own and I have no doubt that the knowledge and care that Job and Family Services passed on to me will be the utmost help, not only now but for the rest of my life.

Thank you.